Hunting Humor

Get Away From my Deer!

It was Saturday morning and Bill, an avid hunter, woke up ready to go bag the first deer of the season. He walks down to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and to his surprise he finds his wife, Susan, sitting there, fully dressed in camouflage. Bill asks her, What are you up to? Susan smiles, I'm going hunting with you! Bill, though he has many reservations, reluctantly decides to take her along.

They arrive at the hunting site. Bill sets his wife safely up in the tree stand and tells her: If you see a deer, take careful aim on it and shoot. I'll come running back as soon as I hear the shot. Bill walks away with a smile on his face knowing that Susan couldn't bag an chicken, let alone a deer.

But not 15 minutes pass when he is startled as he hears several gunshots. Quickly, Bill starts running back to his wife's treestand. As Bill gets closer, he hears Susan screaming, get away from my deer! Confused, Bill races faster towards his screaming wife. And again he hears her yell, get away from my deer! Followed by another volley of gunfire.

Now within sight of where he had left his wife, Bill is surprised to see a cowboy, with his hands high in the air. The cowboy, obviously distraught, says, Okay, mam, okay! You can have your deer! Just let me get my saddle off it!

What is your IQ?

"Wonderful!," says Albert. "We will talk about the Grand Unification Theory and the mysteries of the Universe. We will have much to discuss!"

Next Albert introduces himself to a woman and asks, "What is your IQ?" To which the lady answers, "142."

"That is great!," responds Albert. "We can discuss politics and current affairs. We will have much to discuss!"

Albert asks the next person, "What is your IQ?" to which the man answers, "49."

Albert responds, "Did you get your deer?"